I keep seeing all these posts on facebook and tumblr about being an adult. About how its all boring, tiring, and pushing forward. Those posts make me so pained. Is that all I have to look forward to? Pushing, trudging on, just doing what I need to to make it through another day. If that’s what it really is, then you can keep that future. That future is not something I’d like to partake in. Now, don’t get me wrong, I am well aware there will always be days where it’s all that you can do to get through, and there are hoops everyone in the world has to jump through. But I cannot accept that that is all there is waiting for me in the future. I want so much more from life, and being the very stubborn, selfish person I know I am, I will have it. You cannot tell me to just sit back and let my future unfold in a curtain of greys and blacks. I demand to have color splashed all over my canvas in messy handprints, footprints from running, dramatic brush strokes of memories, and splashes of dark and light to contrast each other. Likewise, I want my clothes and skin to be permanently marked. I need to display the life I’ve lived in all the scars, all the marks and blemishes. I refuse to believe that life is just a series of steps I have to take. I refuse to be restricted to a set of stairs, leading up to my inevitable death and life beyond. I want to take the stairs in leaps and bounds, and, when I reach the top, I want to be sweaty and panting and able to look back at all the paint I’ve splashed all over the canvas draping down my set of stairs like a carpet of life lived, just waiting to me reviewed by someone else. I want that person to be inspired, and to be in awe of the things I’ve managed to do in such a short span of time. Not that I want to rush through life, but I want to feel that on my death bed as I look back at the things I’ve done, I have lived as if my lifetime had been a beautiful splash of memories all wrapped into one, long, extended moment. Maybe our lives are not meant to be a serious of moments, but one long moment of memories and feelings all tied in with peace and rest in those seconds of needed silence. It doesn’t have to be complicated. It’s so simple it makes it complicated. Live. Breath in the air that God so graciously supplied you and stand up. Go the places you wanted. Live your moment. I’ll be perfectly satisfied at the end of my life to know that I refused to just trudge on. If I have kids, I’ll take them on the adventures with me. Show them that they have all the life in the world. Show them just how significant but tiny we are in this world. Who says living is just a series of steps. Roll out your carpet of memories and scars and dark and lights and get going. Make yourself dizzy with anticipation of the next second. And never feel sorry for the time you’ve had so far. Let this moment roll on until it becomes a lifetime. Let one moment expand into your entire life, and value each, tiny memory and second contained within.
You only have one moment. Now use it.
Quote is by Confucius.