“I have to leave, or else they may never have the peace they deserve.”

Today’s topic, kiddies, is sacrifice.  Kids in my day (man, I sound old) believe that they can do whatever they want and get everything they want.  They don’t believe in consequences anymore.  Therefore, they also don’t believe sacrifices are necessary.  You wanna know why that is? Because nobody gives them consequences anymore.  Everyone is too worried about hurting their self esteem.  Don’t worry that your grammar on your paper is awful, what’s important is that you did your best.  Bull! I don’t care how hard you tried, you are taking this paper back and you are fixing your mistakes til there are none left.  Wanna know why? It’s not because I don’t think you’re good enough, it’s because I know you can do better.  Another example? I heard on the radio today that a father took his 12 year old’s phone away because he saw a rude text and her mother (his ex-wife) called the cops on him for stealing.  Totally ridiculous! The mother’s excuse was that if he’d just given the phone back it wouldn’t have happened.  Ugh, things like this drive me up the wall.  The father won the case and wasn’t charged, but now his daughter won’t have anything to do with him.  Aw poor lil bebe can’t be a bitch to daddy (excuse me, I don’t normally cuss, but that was necessary).  Like I said, no consequences.  The girl got punished, but the dad ended up getting worse for trying to raise his daughter right to respect her parents and others! So, branching off of consequences, we reach the subtopic of sacrifice.

Let me explain this to you now, teens, being an adult, in fact, being a person, requires sacrifices.  You wanna eat a candybar? You gotta sacrifice a little money.  Same principle applies with everything else: relationships, goals, work, etc.  In relationships, it’s a give and take.  You give a little, the other gives a little back.  If it doesn’t work that way, fix it.  You may have to sacrifice one goal to achieve another, more important one.  I may have to give up on my dream of voice acting (for a little while) so that I can get my degree in English.  The world is full of sacrifices.  The biggest one teenagers face, emotionally, though, is choosing between themselves, their significant other, and/or their dreams or goals.  It can be a three way street, or maybe just a two way street.  Do I stay with them even though they want me to change *insert characteristic here*? Do I stay with them even though they want me to change or give up my dream? Do I give them up to achieve my goals because I’m starting to feel as if they’re holding me back? Do I change myself a little to look more appealing and use this to achieve my goal?  Do I stay myself, change for them, or let them go and chase my dreams?  All terribly agonizing questions that keep lots of people up at night, including me.

The thing you have to understand, though, is that, no matter what, you’re going to have to give something up to get something else.  You aren’t capable of keeping everything you want.  It just doesn’t work that way.  I’m not say you have to settle, but if you don’t want to settle in one aspect, you’re going to have to sacrifice another aspect.  I don’t wanna settle for a bachelors degree, but he/she wants me to marry them as soon as I get the degree.  You have to chose which is more important to you in this situation.  Now, it may work out as: I will marry you and find a job with the degree I have.  Or, the better option in my opinion: I have to go and chase this dream of mine, and if you don’t understand and wait for me, then I guess we aren’t meant for each other.  Or the third option which I find least appealing (due to the struggles of college life alone): I’ll marry you, but you have to let me get my masters after that.  Do you understand what I am saying? You have to evaluate what’s most important to you, and what you’re willing to sacrifice, and then take the leap.

I think the most important thing about this is this: always stay true to yourself.  Yes, sacrificing something will hurt, but you have to stick to what you want and believe.  I don’t believe in fate or destiny or anything like that.  I believe we work and form our own futures based on the things we give up and the things we chase and gain.  Stay true to yourself! If you want that degree, go get it, no matter what.  If you’re willing to give up some things to marry them or date them, then do it! If you feel smothered by either of those ideas and believe you just need to be on your own, making it up as you go, then freewrite my little butterfly! Just stick to what you know and make it up as you go along.  Just remember to think on the things that are important to you and what you’re willing to give up in your life.  Because one day, the sunny morning will come, when you are faced with the grimm dilemma of one thing or the other.  Me or him/her? Him/her or my dreams? Me or my dreams? My dreams, him/her, or me?  Think before you leap, and always, always remember there are very real consequences to everything you do.


I believe you can do it, and I know you can do better than every time before!


Quote is from my book: “I have to leave, or else they may never have the peace they deserve.”~Avana Black; Dark Energy: The Line.


“Because I’m just the broken ballerina with hazel brown eyes.”

Ok kids, it’s story time so gather round and listen carefully to Aunt Rebel.  Once upon a time, I participated in a beauty pageant – please, don’t laugh, that’s the point of this post.  At said beauty pageant our third round of judging was based off an interview.  My interviews were going fine until I sat down with a judge and she asked me the strange question of, “Why do you like your hair so short?” Now, the rounds for each of our four interviewers were only a minute each, so I briefly explained how easy it was to care for and how well it suited my facial structure.  Right before the buzzer went off, the woman commented, “But don’t you think you look like a boy?” I never got to respond because I had to move to a different table.  Half the reason I wanted to do the pageant was to help shatter the stereotypes that beauty queens and important women were all plastic barbie dolls with long flowing hair.  The pageant pamphlet boasted choice purely on character and ability, but I could clearly see that that was not the case.  Now, I haven’t decided if I want to go back this year or not, because I did enjoy it, but I must speak out.

Shatter your stereotypes because shocker, people, girls with short hair aren’t all lesbians and boys who wear pink aren’t all gay.

All I’ve ever heard from the boys that confess their feelings to me is how cool I am.  They can talk to me like one of the guys.  Joke inappropriately and I still laugh.  I’m good at sports.  I listen to hard rock and electronic music.  I dress in dark clothes, jeans, and I don’t wear a ton of makeup.  I can hold my own in fights and arguments and I don’t get my feelings hurt easily.  *Balls all of that up and throws it out a window* Sorry, boys but that’s not all there is to me.  Behind the short hair and tomboyish grin is a girl with a love of the arts.  I’m someone who listens to classical music all day and still get’s moved by Mozhart and other composers.  I’m the girl who stands on her back porch and practices opera pieces.  The girl who likes to sketch all day while curled up under the awning of the front porch and watching the rain fall in the Autumn.  I pull my hair back with lace and ribbons, wear frills, design my own clothes, and enjoy movies like Pride and Prejudice.  I’m the girl who believes the English language, and other languages, are an art.  I practice my French to my dogs.  I write poetry and love the piano, even though I can’t play.

All I’ve ever heard in my life was how cool and tough I am.  People automatically assume I’m a tomboy because I have short hair and don’t like wearing a lot of makeup.  Because I don’t look elegant.  I think it’s time we stop looking at someone’s surface and read a little deeper into them.  Pink is a nice color, and guys can wear it too.  Gay men can be tough and gay women can be gentle.  No one is defined by what they wear or what they look like.  Let us just look at each other’s souls and know that they are beautiful on the inside.  We all have our own talents and abilities.  Just throw out the word stereotype all together.  And let your short hair flap in the wind as you paint water color.  Or tie your long hair back and get dirty.  Who you are is up to you, and no one else.  Don’t ever let someone change you just because they don’t like the way you are.

Story time is over 😛


“I’m no knight in shining armor, or a princess in disguise, I’m just the broken ballerina with the hazel brown eyes.” -Hero ~Makka The Amerikan